The Furthest Point

Portrait Thoughts #1

2009-05-07T12:27:00.007-04:00

Eric was satisfied when he received this print of his portrait. He felt his request to have the photographer capture his "serious" and "playful" side was taken with just the right amount of "creativity" without looking too "art weird." Eric would return four years later to have himself photographed with his degree in engineering.

This picture would mark a historical date in the war between the Roberts Brothers. Steven (bottom left) and William (bottom right) followed in their Father's footsteps by keeping the traditional Roberts' look, while Luke (top Left) and Clem (top right) took their Mother's advice to "Loose the glasses and run a wet comb through your hair." A clear line was drawn that day and was rumored to be the reason Clem and Luke were not invited to Steven's ranch style wedding some seventeen years later.

Tina had asked the question "Collar up or down?" all the while fully knowing the answer.

*Inspired by Jaydollah's question "what's that one website that has all the olan mills photos of ugly ass people?" 11:21 am 06/07/09

Makes Me Nervous

2009-05-06T14:41:00.005-04:00

It was bad enough when The Matrix came out and crazy people found a way to channel their inner psychotic rage by wearing trench coats and shooting people. Now that the Wolverine movie is out, I gotta worry about this guy getting mad at me because I'm taking too long to pick out a Blizzard flavor at the Dairy Queen.

It's Up To You...

2009-04-29T19:19:00.004-04:00

I'd love to set you up with a clue as to what you're about to see, but like a van Gogh painting, I'll just let it speak for itself:

For years there's been a "little person" claiming to have been Gary Oldman's stunt double, and nobody believed him...until now:)

Bow To The Baby

2009-04-21T16:38:00.003-04:00

This child will either:
A) Front a Metal band
B) One day rule this planet
or
C) Both 'A' and 'B' at the exact same time

ALT VERSION POST:
This child should either be:
A) Placed on a throne and worshiped
or
B) Destroyed immediately before it amasses too much power.

Does This Seem Odd?

2009-04-05T10:52:00.005-04:00

Should people be winning guns?

Holy Cow

2009-03-27T14:17:00.006-04:00

I'm a fan of Top Chef host Padma Lakshmi (aesthetically speaking that is) and I'm also a fan of bacon cheeseburgers. So you can image my surprise when I saw this commercial featuring those two things fornicating.

Pretty sure there's a "special sauce" joke to be used, but it's too nice out today for that sort of potty humor.

Dear MTA

2009-03-25T11:56:00.009-04:00

This is YOUR solution to YOUR debt:

The LIRR's service to Belmont ends in late April.
Subway and bus fares would go up on May 31.
- Single rides would go from $2 to $2.50—a 25% hike;
- 7-day unlimited cards would be $31 (currently $25)—a 24% hike;
- 14-day unlimited cards would be $59 (currently $47)—a 25% hike;
- 30-day unlimited card would be $103 (currently $81)—a 27% hike;
- 7-day express bus cards would be $51 (currently $41)—a 24% hike;
- Pay-per-ride Metrocard bonuses are kept intact (though what the final bonuses are is still undetermined)
Metro-North and LIRR fares will go up about 23% on June 1.
Bridge and tunnel tolls increase in July.
City bus routes are eliminated over the summer; the W and Z lines are eliminated in the fall as the M and G service is cut.

Great job pinheads. Feel free to come into my apartment and take 25% of my stuff. Sure I'll argue against it, but who would listen, right? Dicks.

And look at that even Jesus hates you, and from what I hear he likes most people, so what does that say about you? Dicks.

You're a bunch of dicks. Seriously.

If They Can't Make It, How Can We?

2009-03-13T13:41:00.007-04:00

Bristol Palin and her baby's Daddy, Levi Johnston (great cowboy/porn name?) have broken off their engagement and called it quits.

I can tell you right now that Levi made a huge mistake and a very poor choice in judgement. I'm not talking about getting a high school girl pregnant, or even the fact that the relationship is over. I'm talking about the 'World's Greatest Mother-In-Law' mug he made in ceramics class. What a maroon.

Dear Ice Cream Man

2009-02-11T09:16:00.007-05:00

Here in NYC February 9th may be a little too soon to continuously circle my block while chiming your ever so familiar tune. It made me feel uneasy and dazed, much like a bear who's awoken before the end of its hibernation. This is not the season for children to be running down the street, dollars in hand, ready to sample your wares. I spent my whole life building a tolerance for your music and that tolerance only lasts a few months. If you start now, then by May I'll be at my breaking point with you.

You're pushing it Ice Cream Man, chill out.

Unless you were one of those ice cream trucks that secretly sell pot. After doing a little research I was amazed at how many times Ice Cream Men got busted for selling marijuana. I mean, a brightly colored truck, blaring annoying music and surrounded by children doesn't sound like the most covert operation.

If you think about it, the Mailman should sell pot. The amount of clients, plus the outstanding distribution speed, would equal a one of a kind operation.

(Photo by CC)

*UPDATE - Just looked up Mailmen that have been busted for selling pot, there are plenty.

This Is Not The Sword Show I Was at But...

2009-02-05T10:06:00.005-05:00

I really wish that dude crowd surfing as at my show.

Heavy Metal At Its Finest

2009-01-31T20:33:00.007-05:00

If you live somewhere in the five boroughs of NYC and last Friday night you felt the ground tremble as if Zeus himself was tap dancing in Times Square, it was just The Sword playing at Bowery Ballroom.

The Furthest Point Welcomes, 8-Ball Willis!

2009-01-23T18:54:00.018-05:00

8-Ball is a prison inmate that spends a lot time doing what he does best, giving sound advice. He's spent the majority of his years behind bars, so he tends to only have "prison experience" when it comes to relating to other people's problems . But that doesn't mean he can't help.

He's made the move over to The Furthest Point and is ready to give YOU advice on whatever topic you choose. You can send your questions here Email 8-Ball and he'll answer you on this blog under the title "Ask 8-Ball."

To give you a better idea of what his style is like, here's some letters that 8-Ball has answered in the past:

Dear 8-Ball,
My best friend and I just started seventh grade and we're in the same homeroom. She is already the teacher's pet and gets all the attention. I get good grades and try to answer questions but our teacher usually calls on Darla and not me. I'm tired of her always being the star of the class. What can I do?
-Samantha, age 12

Dear Samantha,
You really shouldn't worry about your friend; you should be concentrating on yourself and your studies. Your friend Darla seems to have a need for attention, which can be very irritating for others.

This reminds me of a former inmate named Big Lou. He had a big mouth and always needed attention. One day Lou was in the yard and started telling everyone that a certain someone was a "punk-ass." Well that certain someone did not like any of this. So he made sure some crushed prison-issue soap got mixed into Lou's lunch. This caused Lou some annoying little pains and many bowel movements. So when Lou ran to the bathroom in distress, that certain someone was waiting there for him. That certain someone then proceeded to jam his makeshift plexiglass knife into Lou's sternum. Once it was securely in, he broke off the handle so Lou couldn't pull out the shiv from his blood-filling lungs. As that certain someone watched the life drain from Big Lou's eyes, he then said "Now who's the punk-ass, bitch?"

So you see, Samantha, I wouldn't worry too much.

Good Luck!

Dear 8ball,
what should i do? im really bored!! please help me! what should i do to cure this bordem? --summerbordem

Dear Summerbordem,
When you say "bordem" did you mean Borden as in Gail Borden, Jr. (1801-1874)? Ya know, the first man to develop a commercial method of condensing milk. Or did you mean boredom? Ya know, the condition of being bored.

If it's the latter, then I'd suggest getting a hobby. It gets pretty boring here in the joint, that's why I started this advice column. It keeps me very busy and alert-- then again so does the fear of violence, rape and drug addiction.

And if it's the former, well then you're just plain insane.

Good Luck!

Dear 8-Ball Willis,

I have a simple question for you. I was wondering, what do you think a guy really looks for in a girl?

-Curious Carol

Dear Curious Carol,

As the old saying goes "Different strokes for different folks".

Every man has his own personal style when it comes to finding a girl. Some men look for beauty; others value intelligence. Some look for a hybrid of both. But from what I can tell from the guys in here, they look for a smaller lady. The small size helps for overpowering and making her dismembered body parts fit nicely in the trunk of a car.

On the other hand, some guys here seem to like women that are roughly the same size as them, or even slightly larger--because if you're going to wear a woman's skin, it better fit, and fit well.

Good Luck!

So if you're looking for a fresh perspective or advice, then just "Ask 8-Ball."

RECESSION TIPS FOR THE MAFIA

2009-01-23T15:20:00.005-05:00

Let’s face it these financial times are tough. Most of us can look to Unemployment for aid and help with searching the job market. But for some specific craftsmen, there’s really no one they can turn to. So for those in Organized Crime, I offer these solutions for saving a few bucks:

Use Piano Wire and or Knives – Bullets cost money and can’t be reused. By choosing a piano wire or knife for various up-close hits, you’re not only cutting down costs but you’re also getting in touch with your craft by having a more “hands on” approach.

Severed Donkey Heads – Donkeys are a lot cheaper than horses. So when you want to send a message “old school style” a donkey pretty much gets the same point across. Nobody’s gonna turn those bed sheets down and say “Not to worry, it’s only a donkey head.”

Fake Diamonds or “Fugazis” – Continue to get your wives the real stuff because they’re the “mother of your children!” But when it comes to your girlfriends or “Goomars” you can cut costs by getting fake ones. You really should be doing that anyways because chances are they won’t be around for too long, one way or another.

The Olive Garden – Those fancy dinners at high-end Italian eateries can really add up. You’re going to have to hit the old Olive Garden. Actually I hear it’s pretty good. There was a commercial for it on TV the other day. It was a family that had a relative coming over from Italy and in order to give him a taste of the “old country” they took him to the Olive Garden. He really seemed to like it. Plus there's like unlimited salad and bread!

And of course some classic money-saving ideas will always help like: carpooling, brown bagging and ratting on your friends.

Ramalama Ding Dongs

2009-01-19T19:53:00.004-05:00

A day in the life of the New York Post:

REPORTER: I just finished my "It's a Ram Shame" article about former Jets coach Steve Spagnuolo becoming the new coach of the St. Louis Rams. I need a real killer picture to go with it. What do you creative maniacs have in mind?

PHOTOSHOP GUY: How about we put ram horns on his head?

REPORTER: Damn. How the hell do you guys keep hitting it out of the park?

Fun With Costumes

2009-01-02T22:56:00.013-05:00

Recently I looked up "Thundercat costumes" for a post and I had such a good time that I went ahead and looked up some Comic-Con costumes. I've been to a few Cons and for those who haven't, please enjoy this quick costume review of what you've been missing:

This guy is dressed as the Death Star from Star Wars. Why?

Next up it's a Comic-Con classic, Wolverine. You'll see a lot of Wolverine costumes at these sort of conventions. The big difference between this guy's and all the rest - they all have Wolverine's trademark claws and their costume doesn't look like it's been sitting on the floor since last years Comic-Con. Fabreze that shit yo.

Well, what do we have here? Looks like a pretty cool group. Let's see: a very tiny Green Lantern, a Telemundo Superman, the Robin is OK, can't really get a good look at Batgirl back there (probably a good thing), Wonder Woman isn't quite as Amazon looking as she should be and, well, let's just call the last one an ill fitting Supergirl.

This is an action figure of Tiny from Gatchamen/Battle Of The Planets. He's called Tiny ironically. That means that this next guy who dressed like him...

totally got it right. Although the flip flops really makes him look like a silly willy.

Instead of taking the family to Disney, you dressed them up as The Incredibles and took them to Comic-Con. Was it to get your wife to dress up in a sexy superhero outfit...

or was it to shame and mentally scar your Son? Two birds with one stone, great job Pop.

Now THIS is how you do it right. You're a hot chick with one leg. So why not go as Cherry Darling from Grindhouse who just so happens to be a hot chick with one leg who ends up attaching a machine gun to it for killing zombies. Great job!

Slow News Day

2008-12-28T22:58:00.004-05:00

This was in Sunday's NY Daily News:

LONG ISLAND TEENAGER ACCUSED OF DRIVING HIGH ON DRUGS, WHILE PASSENGER VOMITED OUT WINDOW

THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

Sunday, December 28th 2008, 10:31 AM

FARMINGVILLE, N.Y. A Long Island teenager has been accused of driving with one car door open and a passenger vomiting out a window.

Suffolk County highway patrol officers say the 17-year-old Nesconset (nes-KON’-set) resident was high on drugs when he was arrested Saturday morning. They say his 15-year-old passenger was leaning out the window of the open door while throwing up.

An officer stopped the car in Farmingville around 3 a.m.

The driver has been charged with unlawful possession of marijuana, driving while impaired by drugs and endangering the welfare of a child.

The passenger has been turned over to a guardian. Child welfare authorities have been notified.

Informative from the get go, "the 17-year-old Nesconset (nes-KON’-set) resident..." The whole time I was pronouncing "Nesconset" just as it's spelt and now I finally know that I was correct.

What's wrong with these LI teenagers? Smoking weed, driving, puking? Just the thought of teenagers acting like this make ME want to vomit. Where are their parents and church leaders? How does something like this happen in America?

Well at least I know where to party in Long Island. My only fear is that this Daily News story will alert the rest of the tri-state area about Mad Phat Farmingville and the place will be totally played-out in no time. Like Seattle, after Grunge.

Thanks NY Daily news, it's reporting like this that will truly keep newspapers from becoming obsolete.

Thundercats

2008-12-23T07:07:00.004-05:00

Most fake fan trailers are lame, but they usually give you a quick smirk as to say "Holy shit, can you imagine if that was the actual trailer?" This fake Thundercats trailer is pretty damn smooth. Someday they will make a Thundercats film, odds are it will completely suck. So until that "real" crappy trailer comes, please enjoy this awesome "fake" one:

Bonus Stuff! Here's a look at some people who will be more excited about a Thundercats movie than you:

First up it's Loin-O, King of the Thundercats! I don't know what's more disappointing about his costume, is it the sneakers or the lame oven mitt glove? Oh wait, I know, it seems like this kitty hasn't been neutered (yeesh). Just to make matters worse, it sure doesn't look like he's at Comic-Con or any other place suitable for dressing as your favorite 80's cartoon hero. Looks like someone needs to call HR to explain the rules of 'Casual Friday'.

Here we have Cheetara and Lion-O. I noticed a gentleman sitting in a wheelchair behind them. He looks depressed. He was probably sad about not being able to walk and THEN he saw that guy dressed as Lion-O and just fell further. Poor bastard.

OK these children look shitfaced. The 2nd kid on the left is Lion-O and even though there's a girl dressed as a cat in the middle, I believe it has no "Thundercat" relation. Then again we could always ask tiny Uncle Sam next to her, see what he thinks. You dressed you kid up as Uncle Sam? You could always just get him a lunchbox that says "please wedgie me" which would make things a lot quicker.

(sigh) Where to begin? Here we go: you're a dude, dressed as a chick, based on an 80's cartoon, you put the Thundercats emblem on you car AND you personalized your plate to say "TCATSHO". And yes, I know it means "Thundercats Ho!" which is what Lion-O calls out to rally the Thundercats. What else can I say but great job and meeeeeeeow.

Redemption - 80's style!

2008-11-25T14:05:00.003-05:00

Hey do you want to see a cheesy/amazing 80's version of The Shawshank Redemption? Yeah you do:

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

Steven Seagal

2008-11-24T14:53:00.005-05:00

Apparently there's a new reality show starring Steven Seagal.

"Hollywood action man Steven Seagal is to take part in a new reality series which will chronicle his little-known role as a police officer in Louisiana.

The Under Siege star has been a fully commissioned deputy at the state’s Jefferson Parish Sheriff’s Office for the last 20 years.

As well as going out on patrol, Seagal is said to be an expert marksman, working with the force’s Swat team, and has instructed officers in firearms and hand-to-hand combat.

The new show, which has been commissioned by America’s A+E network, will be titled Steven Seagal: Lawman and will follow the actor as he fights crime in Louisiana."

Years ago I worked on an award show where Steven was a presenter. He was difficult, rude, poorly hitting on anything female and wearing a yellow kimono with jeans - otherwise known as complete awesomeness (just like this picture):

Many years later I worked on a show that involved professional stunt people. After getting to know a few I asked who's the biggest "action star" asshole they've ever had to work with? They all said Seagal and they all had the same complaint - he never pulls his punches. This lead them to tell me the great story of Gene LeBell vs Seagal.

Gene is an old school stuntman and Judo expert. Long story short, Seagal said that LeBell couldn't choke him out. A few minutes later Seagal was passed out on the floor and his pants were wet.

And here's the man that did it:

Fantastic.

So If I were the producers of the new Steven Seagal reality show, I would have these two meet up for coffee. Or maybe a nice glass of this:

2 Quick Things...

2008-11-12T14:01:00.003-05:00

I want to formally apologize if I ever mentioned that the Osmonds didn't have what it takes:

And anyone who watched a lot of cable tv in the early 80's should enjoy this:

Political Fight

2008-10-09T12:21:00.010-04:00

Yup, it was bound to happen sooner or later. Finally we have the best way for the average American to choose their next President. Get ready...FIGHT!

Here's a bonus unrelated/related clip:

Ladies and Gentlemen...

2008-10-04T15:07:00.004-04:00

I'd like to introduce you to a little something called, Karma

13 years to the day - amazing.

Knowing how well OJ likes to capitalize on anything, I'd like to formally pitch a new reality show for him. The premise will be OJ's life behind bars and we'll call it, wait for it, wait for it...'Canned Juice.'

I eagerly await a response from anyone with the power of attorney in Mr. Simpson's interest.

A Pledge

2008-09-26T11:42:00.003-04:00

If John McCain becomes Commander In Chief then I will do everything humanly possible to insure his safety. I will take a bullet, donate a kidney, even let them transfer his brain into my younger body for longevity.

I will do anything to make sure this thing isn't the leader of the free world for the next four years.

After eight years of W and a possible four of this pee-brained witch, we'll be the laughing stock of the world.

Put it this way, if USA was a television show and the rest of the world was the tv viewing audience, we'd be that show 'According To Jim.' My point being, people will look and say "How the fuck is that thing still on the air?"

Dear Fox News,

2008-09-24T21:59:00.006-04:00

I would like to offer my services as consultant. In what regard you ask? Let's call it, um - common sense. Yes that's it, a common sense consultant. Here's how we can make it happen.

I'll work from home, you guys run ideas by me and I'll give you feedback. I know things are pretty busy over there, running a 24 hour news channel and all, so consider me a safety net for some things that may fall through the cracks. Here's one example:

Let's say you called me and asked if I thought it was a good idea to label Michelle Obama as "Obama's Baby Mama."

Then I would have said "yes."

Actually, I guess you guys really don't need my services after all. Keep up the great work and God bless America.

WHAT?!

2008-09-24T11:37:00.003-04:00

I'm speechless. Please discuss through the comment section if you're as shaken up as me.

Jesus, talk about not knowing a guy.

Dude...

2008-09-09T13:28:00.003-04:00

Here's a look at the new Big Lebowski 10th Anniversary DVD edition:

Need I say more?

This is not new, it's The Big He-Bowski:

Ladies and Gentlemen - John McCa...zzzzzzzzz

2008-09-05T11:14:00.008-04:00

Wow, was that boring. Just bring Sarah Palin back out for an encore please. Getting me to watch the RNC live, not edited down on the news, is something I never thought would happen. This week though I was there, tuned in. People REALLY wanna talk about John McCain's life, I mean like, a lot.

If you guys like him so much, if he's SUCH the right "American" for you, then why didn't you support him more when he ran in 2000? Oh wait, I remember, you guys liked George W and used all the Bush money and power to run smear campaigns about this "great American" who I guess wasn't quite "American" and "great" enough yet. Amazing what 8 years will do.

How many times do we need to hear about McCain's life? I know the guy is more American than me and probably you, I have no problem saying that...about you. Is it more of "Well you haven't heard Fred Thompson's version yet..." sorta thing? Seriously, if anyone still doesn't know about this man's life please stand up and give a goofy smile...

Not so fast Lindsay Graham you goddamn suck-up.

I watched McCain's speech for as long as I could but at one point I had to change the channel. I decided to watch an old episode of 'Spider-Man and his Amazing Friends.'

Pretty good episode, Iceman, Firestar and Spidey were trying to stop The Sandman from robbing an armored car. Sandman found out Spidey's secret identity, which you can imagine caused some drama.

What I Learned Last Night

2008-09-04T12:58:00.005-04:00

If you mix these together:

You end up getting this:

Right back at ya sweetheart ;)

Bonus Info:

She's a good shot as well.

Reason #176 Proving The Internet Is Scary

2008-08-21T14:53:00.004-04:00

You're drinking your morning coffee and this gets forwarded to you:

Now you could go on for days trying to understand what's happening in this picture. What you really need to be concerned about is what's in the box under his bed. Is it something that he's not proud of, like: guns, Guitar Hero and body hair? Or perhaps it's something too good - too good for the world. Yes, that's it, it's something that the world isn't ready for...yet.

Let's Shake On It

2008-08-14T11:45:00.004-04:00

An over enthusiastic fan gave Cindy McCain a little too much lovin' during a recent handshake encounter and sprained her hand. I found a Youtube clip of the guy, he seems like a strong supporter.

Larry Bird

2008-08-09T10:17:00.010-04:00

My favorite basketball player of all time is Larry Bird. When I was a kid I worshiped the ground he walked on. If there was 1 second left on the clock, that was all the time he needed to make something happen. He couldn't run, he could couldn't jump but he dominated the court.

Larry Bird retired in 1992, that's 16 years ago. So I guess I'll throw this one right at the creative geniuses at the Skechers shoe company...what the hell is wrong with you?

What child in this day and age would want a Larry Bird sneaker? And even if they did want them, how in the world did that commercial make it on air? Don't they have meetings and such? Doesn't somebody have to approve it first, like an important person or something? They're not even green!

Is this how it happened?

"Hey what's the date today? What?! The 15th! We're supposed to deliver the Larry Bird kid shoe commercial tomorrow. Well let's get our top guys on it pronto. Oh, they're all on working on the Bo Jackson mandel. Alright then just have the intern do it. Someone print out some Wikipedia info of Bird for him."

Seriously, a guy with an NBA career like this...

NBA champion (1981, '84, '86)
NBA Finals MVP (1984, '86)
NBA MVP (1984, '85, '86)
Nine-time All-NBA First Team (1980-88)
All-NBA Second Team (1990)
All-Defensive Second Team (1982, '83, '84)
NBA Rookie of the Year (1980)
One of the 50 Greatest Players in NBA History (1996)
Olympic gold medalist (1992)

...deserves a better commercial. Eat shit Skechers, you fuckin' nitwits.

He Is Coming, The Chosen One

2008-08-07T09:52:00.004-04:00

I've searched the stars, consulted the bones and double checked my math...our savior will be born roughly nine months from now.

Mixed Martial Arts fighter Tito Ortiz and his Pornstar girlfriend Jenna Jameson are expecting a child...such an understatement. You'd be a fool not to begin your worshiping now. The combination of these two people and their professions can only result in something this world has never known before.

So here's to your King...

Here's to your Queen...

And here's to your new God...

He is a merciful God, he only asks that you kneel....

Well, That REALLY Sucks

2008-08-05T18:22:00.006-04:00

Iggy and the Stooges (featuring Mike Watt on bass) got their gear stolen on August 4th outside the:

EMBASSY SUITES HOTEL
208 SAINT ANTOINE OUEST,
MONTREAL, QUEBEC, CANADA

"All equipment was in a rented penske 15 foot yellow truck
with u.s. (michigan) license plate number AC46493
parked immediately outside the hotel, the theft had to have happened in the morning, between 6:30 and 7:30 am..."

What the fuck, this couldn't have happened to... um.... I can't even think of a new (crappy) band's name. What the fuck, this couldn't have happened to Creed?! I know the year is wrong but it feels like the right thing to say.

And look at the what the dirty bastards grabbed:
Vintage Gibson bass that had been Mike Watt's go-to instrument since his Minutemen days in the 1980s

Red roadcase containing:
Red Gibson 1963 EB-3 bass (this is mike watt's bass!) USA No serial number

Black roadcase containing:r
Reverend Flying V guitar - Volcano black USA #08001

Black roadcase containing:
Reverend Orange guitar USA 03416 ZSL7

Black fibre case containg:
Gibson red SG short scale bass USA No serial number

Black roadcase containing:
Marshall Vintage/Modern Amplifier UK M-2007-07-0926-2 RoHS

Black roadcase containing:
Marshall Vintage/Modern Amplifier UK M-2007-07-0927-2 RoHS

4x Marshall 4x12 Cabinets (with Tuki cover) UK #1 Slant: M-2007-05-0149-0

4x Marshall 4x12 Cabinets (with Tuki cover) UK #2 Straight: M-2006-49-0380-0

4x Marshall 4x12 Cabinets (with Tuki cover) UK #3 Slant: M-2007-05-0150-0

4x Marshall 4x12 Cabinets (with Tuki cover) UK #4 Straight: M-2006-49-0381-0

Orange Calzone road case containing:
Guitar pedal board and pedals USA/Japan No serial number
Assorted leads USA/UK No serial number
2x mic stands Germany No serial number
Assorted strings and spares USA No serial number
plus:
2x Boss TU2 Chromatic Tuner
Boss CH1 Super Chorus
Fulltone OCD Overdrive
Crybaby Wah
Peterson Strobo-Stomp Tuner Pedal
Whirlwind A/B Boxes
Whirlwind Cable Tester
and many many istrument cables
various tools ( screwdrivers, soldering iron, pliers, etc... )
tambourine and maracas

Cardboard box containing:
Assorted replacement drum heads USA No serial number

Gretsch Silver Sparkle Catalina drum kit USA No serial number
26" Kick Drum No serial number
13" Rack Tom No serial number
18" Floor Tom No serial number
4x Cymbal Stands No serial number
1x Snare Stand No serial number
1x Hi Hat Stand No serial number
1x Drum Throne No serial number

Eden D810 Bass cabinet USA D810RP4 0703E5001

Eden D810 Bass cabinet USA D810RP4 0703E5002

Cardboard box containg:
Eden VT300 Bass amplifier USA 0601E5115

Cardboard box containg:
Eden VT300 Bass amplifier USA 0507E5033

Floor Fan CHINA No serial number

Floor Fan CHINA No serial number

Green clamshell suitcase containing:
Yamaha snare drum JAPAN No serial number
Yahama kick pedal JAPAN No serial number
Zildjian Mega Bell cymbal USA No serial number
Zildjian 15" Hi-Hats USA No serial number
3x Zildjian 18" 19" 20" crash medium cymbals USA No serial number

Brown Epiphone guitar case:
Black Epiphone EB3 short scale bass KOREA F300503

1 x Wheeled Black Pelican case (50cm x 28cm x 20cm) containing :
A selection of microphones and microphone accessories, most of which are in separately labeled black pouches. All of the microphones are of Shure manufacture, also a BSS DI box. Inside the Pelican case there is also a Ferrari pencil case containing an iPod, iPod accessories, various small cables and adaptors, a Leatherman Charge, a Stooges AAA tour laminate, some pain killers, some sharpies, some electrical tape, some business cards (Mr Rik Hart). Within the case there is also a big pair of Sony headphones (model MDR7506) with a long curly cable and three very long XLR to XLR mic cables. Here's a more specific list of the microphones :
2 x SM91
5 x SM98
2 x B98
2 x SM81
2 x KSM32
1 x KSM27
2 x B52
3 x SM57
8 x SM58
1 x BSS AR-133 DI Box
(all manufactured by shure)

http://www.hootpage.com/stoogesstolenstuff/stoogesstolenstuff.html

Pics of the stolen gear here.

The 'W' Trailer Has Arrived

2008-07-28T14:47:00.008-04:00

As I've mentioned before I'm eagerly awaiting Oliver Stone's biopic about George Bush. It's not because I'm a big fan of Stone's movies or that I think this will change people's views on Dubya himself. His life and career are even more ridiculous than any Hollywood hack writer could come up with.

If you went to see a movie about a President of the United States that couldn't read but had the authority to make decisions about going to war, but he was really chummy and liked to joke around :) then you'd say "That Jerry Bruckheimer has done it again! Three cheers for Jerry!" That's what you'd say.

So without further ado, I give you the teaser trailer for the most unbelievable/believable movie of all-time.

The Watchmen

2008-07-18T09:42:00.008-04:00

An amazing book written by Alan Moore and drawn by Dave Gibbons. This is the book you start your graphic novel collection with. It's the opposite of most hero stories. This is the other side, the dark side: greed, jealousy, murder and little bit of mental illness...delicious. The debate over making it into a movie has been going on for almost two decades - who, how, when and why?

It's a big, juicy, awesome story. So good in fact that squeezing it into one film is a sin. So much will be lost in the trimming of this tale. The only glimmer of hope was in 1996 when visionary genius Terry Gilliam took a stab at trying to come up with a plan of attack on how to bring this gigantic monster to the big screen. This was the end result, "I think it's going to be impossible to make as a film, unless you make it three and a half hours long, which most people aren't going to want. - Gilliam"

For me, that was all I needed to hear. It's done, no Watchmen movie.

(I had hoped on a Watchmen season, like on HBO. Maybe two seasons, get the whole story in there. But did they listen to me? Noooo...)

So for the past year we knew that Zach Snyder (Director of '300') took on the job. We were teased with update blogs and character pics. I only sat and wondered just how much this film would suck. The trailer, which appears before the new Batman film, is online. I will say this - it looks fucking awesome. Who knows what kind of story they're gonna tell, but it looks exactly like the book...exactly.

Even if you've never read or even even seen the book, you should check out the trailer. I think you'll find that this is a big story, regardless of how the script turns out.

Lemmy

2008-07-08T23:32:00.010-04:00

He was born one day before Jesus (if Jesus had been born in 1945), he's done more speed than you've had coffee and his voice kinda sounds like what your conscience SHOULD sound like (so you always hear it).

He's Lemmy - the lead singer and bassist from one of the toughest, coolest and most clairvoyant hard rock/metal bands of all-time. Sure most of you have heard of Motörhead and you may recognize Lemmy from his trademark mole, but what do you really know about this living legend, a character the contains the essence of what it truly means to live the rock life? Not much? No problem. Somebody went ahead and did the work for you.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you the most perfectly titled movie since "Problem Child" - this is Lemmy: The Movie.

Many years ago I was working on a job that required me to be up at an ungodly time in the morning. I was in a van with Dylan around 5am and we were drinking coffee, rubbing the sleep out of our eyes and sitting in silence at a red light in NYC. As we sat there in our soon to be caffeinated depression, a man crossed into the headlights of our rented van. We looked at him, he looked at us - it was Lemmy.

As cool as we thought we were, he could see our eyes locked on him like it was Mr. Belvedere himself. He cautiously paused, as to make sure we weren't two shitfaced dicks that would plow through a red light at the crack of dawn, and then continued on with what had to be the rest of his night/our morning.

I can't remember who, but one of us said, "Jesus Christ, is that Lemmy?" There needn't be an answer as we both new what had just occurred. We might as well have been on a Rock 'N Roll safari that day/night. Keep your windows rolled up and don't annoy the animals - just sit, watch and observe. Photos and such are available at the gift shop.

Cruisin' For A Bruisin'

2008-07-02T17:28:00.009-04:00

What do you get when you add this:

With this:

And this:

The answer is this:
His name is Tom Davis and he's the head of The Church of Scientology's Celebrity Centre in Los Angles. He's a perfect specimen of Scientology awesomeness.

Let's pretend Tom Cruise had a twin brother (with the same first name) and he had all the energy, determination and spunk that Cruise posses - minus the acting chops, charm and charisma. Tom Davis is that man, let's just call him "The poor man's Tom Cruise."

The clip below is one of the greatest attempts of being intimidating and tough; which completely fails in that objective. It's part of a BBC investigative report on Scientology where reporter John Sweeney is trying to interview former and current members of the "religion." Everywhere John goes Davis shows up with his own camera crew and interrupts. This is just a clip from an 8 part series on Youtube. If you enjoy the following clip, then go here for part 1 and then take it from there. I highly recommend it, ridiculously fascinating.

Tom Davis fact #26 - He is the son of actress Anne Archer.

(Seriously, how much of a hard-on does Davis have for Cruise? Unreal. I can just see him sitting in a white room with every film Cruise has ever done - watching, studying and learning.)

Sometimes...

2008-07-01T08:56:00.003-04:00

words can't describe beauty, art or poetry:

The Wire...HA!

2008-06-27T11:18:00.003-04:00

Plain and simple, this is a clip from the HBO show The Wire where someone has added a laugh track in the background. I loved this show and can tell you that it's probably the furthest thing from a comedy. This is great:

More clips from different shows with added laugh tracks here.

Propellerman

2008-06-26T11:41:00.003-04:00

For those who enjoyed the previous post of phallic comic book villain Codpiece, then you may enjoy his possible nemesis - Propellerman!

*Thanks to Buka for the dink link.

That's Why God Created Bookmarks

2008-06-25T10:52:00.005-04:00

If you're a reader of the Furthest Point then you might want to bookmark the page. I only recommend this because the slightest mistake, given the epic span of the web, could lead you places you may not be ready for.

Example: thefurthestpoint.blogpot.com

Happy Birthday Peter Weller

2008-06-24T08:25:00.006-04:00

Peter's most famous role may have been the cyborg lawman RoboCop, but as far as cult status goes it was the role of Dr. Buckaroo Banzai (a physicist, neurosurgeon, Samurai, rock musician and jet car driver).

The film, The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension, was a Sci-Fi action/adventure (with a tiny dry comedic twist). The story of Buckaroo and his crew defending earth from inter-dimensional aliens had an all-star cast of character actors as well as a young Ellen Barkin and Jeff Goldblum.

The film ends with the words "WATCH FOR THE NEXT ADVENTURE OF BUCKAROO BANZI" and then "BUCKAROO BANZI AGAINST THE WORLD CRIME LEAGUE." Sadly, it never came to be. The end credits continued with his whole crew simply regrouping one-by-one and walking together. Sounds boring but I found myself completely captivated with that and the end credits music. Take a look and a listen.

Here's the trailer (check out just how serious Weller took this role - so intense):

and here's the end credits:

Living Vicariously

2008-06-20T11:07:00.009-04:00

It's no secret that comic book writers create characters that say and do things they wish they could do themselves. Most of the time it's delivered with some subtly - not in the case of the almighty...CODPIECE!The back story is simple, Codpiece was born with a severely less-than flattering ding-dong. High school was miserable for our future phallic villain, as his problems with woman began.

The worry over his "size" was so intense that he become impotent, thus pushing him to exact revenge on society and finally get the recognition he could never naturally receive. Talk about killing two birds with one stone, with his newly formed suit he was able to rob banks and catch the attention of the fairer sex.

You can't break into a safe without a drill and Codpice can't drill into a safe unless it's attached to his codpiece (it's simple math really).

He's even got a boxing glove attachment and missile launcher to thwart the cops. Codpiece truly is a self-made man.

So remember ladies, be careful what you say about a man's "situation" because you never know - he could always build a suit with missiles shooting from his cock.

The End.

Dear CNN,

2008-06-16T22:09:00.007-04:00

Next time you do a story on same-sex marriages, and you want people to read it, then maybe don't use a picture of 87 and 84-year-old sharing denture spit. Just a thought.

P.S.
If one of these ladies is Larry King, then I apologize.

R.I.P. Stan Winston

2008-06-16T20:30:00.004-04:00

Stan was the man when it came to special effects and make-up. He was that guy that who could get me to go to the theater to see a film that I knew I wouldn't like. I'd give one of these, "Well, it's got Stan Winston working on it so can't be that bad, right?" And yes, I'm talking about the film Congo.

Henry T Nicholas III is Not Boring

2008-06-12T11:02:00.005-04:00

He co-founded a high-tech company called Broadcom Corp and he's worth around $2 billion - these two facts are the most boring part of Mr. Nicholas. Instead of giving you the long version, here's a list of not boring things Henry has done:

Spiked the drinks of Broadbcom executives and other tech-industry leaders with ecstasy.
Maintained an underground drug lair (pictured above).
Hired hookers for co-workers, business associates and himself while also supplying them with drugs.
Used Broadcom funds to payoff an employee who knew about his narcotics activities. Payoff was $1 million.
Had an employee give cash to a courier for an envelope containing controlled substances in the lobby of Broadcom headquarters.
Had an oxygen tank for his private jet due to excessive amounts of marijuana smoke.
Instructed co-conspirators and associates to invoice him for drugs with code words like: supplies, party favors and refreshments.

He also loved the bands Metallica, Linkin Park and Orgy. This isn't very interesting but it does paint a better picture of what his secret underground, drug-fueled and prostitute-plenty parties were like.

Henry isn't having that much fun anymore with his twenty-one count indictment for security fraud and four count indictment for drug charges - he's also checked himself into Betty Ford.

Seriously, if you saw a character like this in a film you'd be laughing your ass off at the very notion that a person like this could exist. I'm picturing John Travolta with a bad wig.

'W' Update #2

2008-06-05T18:41:00.003-04:00

This is the teaser film poster for the new Oliver Stone biopic, it's is a collection of "Bushisms." Film Drunk has a bigger version for you to read. If you're new to my fascination with this film, you can catch up by reading here and then here.

Do You Like...

2008-06-05T12:27:00.006-04:00

the band Pulp, the animated Star Trek show and William Shatner covering the Pulp song Common People? Good news, this is right up your alley:

Ah, to be Young Again

2008-06-04T16:23:00.006-04:00

This is not a clever Photoshop, it's real.

Some may see this as negative way for kids to play. Look at it as an easy transition to get them out of the house. Example:

"Stop playing those damn violent video games and go outside, in your completely realistic looking SWAT gear, and pretend to kill each other. It's such a beautiful day and you're wasting it!"

I quote the incomparable Michael Jackson when I say, "I believe that children are the future, teach well and let them lead the way..."

*Update: It's Whitney Houston and not Michael Jackson (both are still incomparable though). Thanks to Doolan for the correction and letting us know that he's the man when it comes to Whitney Houston tunes.

Indiana Jones and the blah blah something about a skull I think

2008-06-02T12:05:00.012-04:00

I wanna thank these people above (and George Lucas) for reassuring me that my original feeling, when I heard about the old gang doing another Indian Jones movie, was correct. That feeling was - "Why?"

After seeing the film last night I would have to say that it should have been rated "S" for "Silly." I was annoyed pretty much from beginning to end. If you're thinking "It's just a film, who cares?" Then I'll pull over right now and you can get out.

I have no spoilers here, but I will say that it felt more like an Indiana Jones theme park ride and not a movie. So instead of bashing this film right away, let's take a look at why there was no need for a 4Th film.

Indian Jones and the Last Crusade was the greatest last film in any trilogy. Fans got to learn the following:

How Indy became terrified of snakes
How the whip became his tool of choice
Where he got his awesome look from
His real name isn't Indiana

All cool info that you could probably label as "campy" if you wanted to ,but it was still done in a fun and exciting way to give fans a bunch of treats for the final film. Otherwise known as - the opposite of Indy 4.

We also got to met his Dad and they:

Run into some Nazi trouble
Solve the big mystery together
All ride off into the sunset at the end...THE END!

Perfect way to close the book on the Indy story. I was ready to move on with my life with a tummy full and satisfied.

But no, in true Lucas fashion, it was time to resurrect the story and totally take a big steamy dump on it. Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is an obtuse and ridiculous idea. To me it felt like it was once a completely separate film project and then someone said, "Why not add Indiana Jones to it!"

What a mess.

It's pretty clear that making an action/adventure movie isn't brain surgery, but the Indy films were the best action/adventure films that Hollywood had to offer. Some people like to give the 2nd film , Temple of Doom, a bad rap. But guess what, with four Indy films out there to date - Doom is the 3rd best...by far.

So I look back at the top of the page to those pictured above (and George Lucas) and say, "What the fuck are you guys smiling at?!"

Come Visit New York

2008-05-31T18:23:00.004-04:00

Every now and then the always understanding and accommodating NYC subway system needs to perform some maintenance. This will cause some changes. Don't worry, they're more than happy to point you in the right direction.

RIP Alexander Courage

2008-05-30T13:38:00.004-04:00

Alexander composed the original Star Trek theme, he also composed music for: Lost in Space, Land of the Giants and Superman IV. He co-wrote the theme for The Waltons, so I guess you can only half-blame him for that depressing tune.

What Happened?

2008-05-29T14:13:00.010-04:00

Former White House Press Secretary Scott McClellan has come out with a book called 'What Happened.' Not a bad title but I think it's missing one of these "?" at the end because Scott knew nothing.

How would I know of such things?

Well I used to watch his press conferences. It didn't matter what the topic was, the answer was always something along the lines of "I cannot comment on that right now...That subject is currently under investigation right now..." etc. So how could a guy whose job was to answer questions, but never had any answers, write a book about what happened?

These press conferences were amazing (I hope they put them all on dvd someday). Scotty was sent out there to get DESTROYED by the press on a daily basis. He never had an answer for anything so he just dragged out his no answer (poorly I might add) and the press just drooled. What a great time to be a reporter. They caught him in lies and contradictions so often that I actually started to feel bad for the guy. All that squirming and sweating must have given him Grand Canyon sized ulcers.

Here's a clip of Scott (not) answering questions about Karl Rove. The reporters actually laugh at some of his answers. He was the Rodney Dangerfield of the White House. Yup, no respect.

FYI- This clip is kinda crappy quality but you'll be glad that you can't really see the look of desperation and fear on Scott's face. Also this clip is a juggernaut that starts slow but just keeps pickin' up steam as it goes. Have patience because it gets worse every minute.

"W" Update #1

2008-05-23T13:27:00.005-04:00

Richard Dreyfuss has just been informally announced as taking the role of Dick Cheney in Oliver Stone's biopic "W."

I think this is actually a pretty good choice, but I still think that at some moment (maybe the pretzel choking incident or perhaps one of the 3527 times Dubya mispronounced a word) Jimmy Fallon will walk on, try to deliver his line, then snicker and mess with his hair.

"Hey does that mean that you're saying this film is gonna seem like one long SNL sketch?"

-Yes I am.

"So you're not gonna go see it?"

-I'm so gonna see it that I feel like I've already seen it. Who is this?

"It's Ioan Gruffudd."

-Oh, you're the guy playing Tony Blair.

"That's right."

-And you also played Reed "Mr. Fantastic" Richards in those awful "Fantastic Four" films.

"Yes, that's correct."

-Perfect.

And if you want to know some personal secret info on the actress that plays Laura Bush, then click here

Splitting Images

2008-05-15T15:31:00.006-04:00

Here's a scenario - You've been lying for years that you're pretty good friends with Michael Bolton. Well this fib finally catches up with you and people demand some proof. What the hell are you gonna do? I'll tell you what - contact the good folks at "Splitting Images Celebrity Lookalike Agency." They'll solve your Michael Bolton problem by sending you...

Michael Hartson (exact Michael Bolton lookalike)

Now for the ladies - You were just dumped and knew that your ex was gonna be at your mutual friend's wedding...with his new girlfriend! Complete nightmare right? Don't worry girls, I'm pretty sure you'd come out on top if you brought...
Brad Pitt!

And to top it off, his pal shows up because the three of you have a plane to catch. That's right, it's Brad's costar from such films as "Ocean's 11, 12 and 13"...
George Clooney!

So fear not regular looking people because Splitting Images is on the case!

It HAS To Be Fun

2008-05-14T10:50:00.013-04:00

Oliver Stone's biopic 'W' is high on my list of can't wait to see films, and I could care less if it's accurate or just completely one-sided. Going on this picture of Josh Brolin as George Dubya, I'm already prepared to be entertained every time he comes on camera.

It could very well be the best looking SNL skit on the big screen. No offense to Josh, but I can't imagine any possible way to play President Bush without looking, and sounding, ridiculous. Not even Shia LaBeouf from the future could do it. NOT EVEN SHIA! I'm already calling it the greatest comedy of the year.

And here's some more awesomeness, this is who's playing Condy Rice (seriously)...

It's almost like they were separated at birth.

Seriously how high was Stone when he cast this film? The answer - just high enough.

This will most definitely NOT be the last time I post about this film.

Party at my place

2008-05-13T12:46:00.003-04:00

I'll supply the Star Trek bottle opener...

and the R2D2 ice bucket with carbonite frozen Han Solo ice cubes.

You guys bring the Romulan ale and blue milk. Then about 30 seconds later the joke will be over.

Halloween Costumes

2008-05-12T15:02:00.011-04:00

Seeing that Halloween isn't even close, why not post 3 costumes that let me know you rule:

1) Austin Powers - "Yeah baby! Does that make you horny?"

It's part of what I like to call "the new classic" costume.

2) The Dick in a Box Guys - This one is great for single guys.

Hot chick at the party- "Come on, what's really holding up that box?" (You are sooo in brah.)

3) Anything Political - Let's me know that you're smart and funny.

Check this one out - Hilary has a leash on Bill. Speaks volumes, but it's not too "in your face" political.

Honorary mentions:
Toga Guy
Sexual Organs
Person who wears a name tag with their own name on it.

Tom Waits Tour

2008-05-06T09:35:00.006-04:00

Tom Waits is going on tour and made a little video to kick things off. The video once again proves (to me at least) that I'll never be able to fully figure Tom out. Oh you think you've got him figured out? Bullshit.

Thanks to Pedro and Sir Stewart for the link.

Eternal Happy Hour

2008-05-06T09:16:00.004-04:00

This is Bill Bramanti and this is his custom-made Pabst Blue Ribbon casket. Bill has decided that when he bites the big one, he’ll do it in style. And ya know what, good for him. It’s your funeral so why not go out in the manner of your choosing. At the very least, you have Dennis Hopper on your side Bill:

See more funny videos at CollegeHumor

Iron Man

2008-05-04T17:28:00.009-04:00

I haven't seen the Iron Man movie yet, but I'm going to soon. I was always a fan of the character and really, how can I not be - an alcoholic futurist that creates a suit of armor capable of doing just about everything...awesome. Being Tony Stark has always been a goal of mine. All I need now is to become a futurist and get that suit and I'm there.

To get ready for the film I've spent the last 48 hours watching this on a repetitive loop. I'm almost ready.

Trailer Park Supervisor Jim Lahey

2008-05-02T11:19:00.008-04:00

Here’s a list of the most memorable drunks in movie history. It’s pretty good, but not great. There’s one character missing and that’s trailer park supervisor Jim Lahey.

You can find this inebriated wonder in 'Trailer Park Boys: The Movie.' The film is a continuation of the popular Canadian comedy show 'Trailer Park Boys.' Lahey was once a police offer who lost his job back in 1977 due to a prank pulled by trailer park resident kids. Now that the kids are all grown up: Ricky (pot dealer), Julian (criminal mastermind of the park with heists including robbing parking meters) and Bubbles (steals broken shopping carts from the market, fixes them, and then sells them back to the market) are feeling Lahey’s wrath as he makes it his mission to get these three kicked out of the trailer park which they love so much.

The show has been a hit in Canada for all of its seven seasons and last year the movie was released in the U.S. If you like great characters and hearing the word “fuck” used as a noun, verb, adverb and adjective a lot - then this show is for you.

Here’s a quick clip of Mr. Lahey explaining to Randy (his bulbous, shirtless sidekick) why he needs the booze to get the job done. You can find tons of Trailer Park Boys Youtube clips if you feel the need venture further into this Canadian masterpiece.

Do The Math

2008-04-30T15:30:00.007-04:00

What do you get when you combine following:

official certificate
post cards
iron on transfer
book cover
newsletter
and a special surprise on your birthday?

Yup, you got it– the ‘Mr. Belvedere Fun Kit’

Happy Birthday Godzilla vs. Mothra

2008-04-29T13:49:00.008-04:00

On this date in 1964 magic happened (not the Dio kind but still similar) and the world was given a monster vs. monster film worthy of destroying 400 miniature city sets. Wired does a much better job detailing this historic event.

Thanks to Mzilla for the link.

The Good Day

2008-04-29T09:38:00.006-04:00

As far as local morning news, I watch Good Day New York. Don’t let the ‘Fox’ name fool you, this is local news: traffic, subway delays, weather, etc.

Now you can tune into any local TV station and get all the same morning news info, so getting good personalities to report this news is key. GDNY tries harder than any other local channel (as I’ve researched) to keep things interesting.

With that said I’d like to present to you what can only be the “jumping the shark” moment in the team’s efforts to be super personable. It’s called 'The Good Day' and makes me wonder what their brainstorming sessions are like.

When you begin the video the first thing you’ll want to do is stop and enjoy ANYTHING else on the Internet. It’s some of the newscasters dancing in the streets of NYC and encouraging the public to join them. Now this isn’t just any dance; it’s a specific dance with instructions and encouragement.

Do what I do and try to think about these reporters as people that someday want to get the call to the big leagues - prime time news. Look into their forced smiles and see the glimmer of a more respectable career dim away to utter darkness as they “Push right, bring it left, roll low, go high & clap.”

Worried that you’ll get lost in this unfamiliar choreography? Don’t be. There’s a quick tutorial before the organized sadness.

King Of Kong

2008-04-28T19:33:00.009-04:00

This film is hands down one of the most riveting documentaries that I've ever seen. It's a simple premise - two guys trying to beat each other at having the world record high score in the classic Donkey Kong arcade game.

If you need more convincing, then check out the trailer. If you're not interested after viewing then I suggest you take a good hard look at yourself and wonder why you wouldn't want to watch a documentary film about two grown men battling for the high score of a game created in 1981.

I Know the Weather is Getting Nice

2008-04-23T20:51:00.005-04:00

Because all I see are these goddamn things.

A Rose is a Rose

2008-04-23T17:48:00.001-04:00

I've never been a fan of Charlie Rose. By the looks of his set (plain dark background, simple wooden table and chairs) you'd think that you were about to get a very intimate interview. Wrong. His half-glazed stare and somewhat irksome look reminds me of a meeting I had with my guidance counselor in the 12th grade.

This was the first time we had ever met but it only took him an astounding 2 minutes to fully understand me as person an advise me on the right path to start my life...with the phone company.

I found this to be funny and informed him that I love phones and use one at home, but I was afraid of falling off the telephone pole and dying. His reply was, "They have other jobs there Kevin, behind a desk for instance."

What a guy. And my name wasn't, and still isn't, Kevin.

Anyway, back to Charlie boy. What's even more irritating than a Charlie Rose interview? How about Rose interviewing Rose? Enjoy...or don't. It's kinda good and bad.

Bill Irwin

2008-04-21T21:36:00.001-04:00

From time to time I'll be posting information about Bill Irwin. This will continue until I feel that you, the reader, will leave with a fair to impressive knowledge of the man.

Some Bill Irwin FAQ's:
Is he that guy that can like squeeze himself into a trunk? Like circus stuff?
-Yes

Was he in the 1980 Robert Altman 'Popeye' film?
-Yes

Could you categorize him as an actor, dancer, performance artist, vaudeville clown, producer, director, writer, and choreographer?
-Yes

Was he in the 'Don't Worry be Happy' video with Bobby McFerrin and Robin Williams?
-Yes

Am I close to knowing everything?
-Not even close pal.

Cheers!

2008-04-21T21:15:00.000-04:00

To The Furthest Point's first post.