Dear MTA

This is YOUR solution to YOUR debt:

• The LIRR's service to Belmont ends in late April.
  
• Subway and bus fares would go up on May 31.
  
  • Single rides would go from $2 to $2.50—a 25% hike;
    
  • 7-day unlimited cards would be $31 (currently $25)—a 24% hike;
    
  • 14-day unlimited cards would be $59 (currently $47)—a 25% hike;
    
  • 30-day unlimited card would be $103 (currently $81)—a 27% hike;
    
  • 7-day express bus cards would be $51 (currently $41)—a 24% hike;
    
  • Pay-per-ride Metrocard bonuses are kept intact (though what the final bonuses are is still undetermined)
• Metro-North and LIRR fares will go up about 23% on June 1.
  
• Bridge and tunnel tolls increase in July.
  
• City bus routes are eliminated over the summer; the W and Z lines are eliminated in the fall as the M and G service is cut.

Great job pinheads. Feel free to come into my apartment and take 25% of my stuff. Sure I'll argue against it, but who would listen, right? Dicks.

And look at that even Jesus hates you, and from what I hear he likes most people, so what does that say about you? Dicks.

You're a bunch of dicks. Seriously.