Monday, June 2, 2008

Indiana Jones and the blah blah something about a skull I think

I wanna thank these people above (and George Lucas) for reassuring me that my original feeling, when I heard about the old gang doing another Indian Jones movie, was correct. That feeling was - "Why?"

After seeing the film last night I would have to say that it should have been rated "S" for "Silly." I was annoyed pretty much from beginning to end. If you're thinking "It's just a film, who cares?" Then I'll pull over right now and you can get out.

I have no spoilers here, but I will say that it felt more like an Indiana Jones theme park ride and not a movie. So instead of bashing this film right away, let's take a look at why there was no need for a 4Th film.

Indian Jones and the Last Crusade was the greatest last film in any trilogy. Fans got to learn the following:
  • How Indy became terrified of snakes
  • How the whip became his tool of choice
  • Where he got his awesome look from
  • His real name isn't Indiana
All cool info that you could probably label as "campy" if you wanted to ,but it was still done in a fun and exciting way to give fans a bunch of treats for the final film. Otherwise known as - the opposite of Indy 4.

We also got to met his Dad and they:
  • Run into some Nazi trouble
  • Solve the big mystery together
  • All ride off into the sunset at the end...THE END!

Perfect way to close the book on the Indy story. I was ready to move on with my life with a tummy full and satisfied.

But no, in true Lucas fashion, it was time to resurrect the story and totally take a big steamy dump on it. Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is an obtuse and ridiculous idea. To me it felt like it was once a completely separate film project and then someone said, "Why not add Indiana Jones to it!"

What a mess.

It's pretty clear that making an action/adventure movie isn't brain surgery, but the Indy films were the best action/adventure films that Hollywood had to offer. Some people like to give the 2nd film , Temple of Doom, a bad rap. But guess what, with four Indy films out there to date - Doom is the 3rd best...by far.

So I look back at the top of the page to those pictured above (and George Lucas) and say, "What the fuck are you guys smiling at?!"

5 comments:

Dool said...

I feel your pain...I really do.

Anonymous said...

CRAPTASTIC! hated it!
I sob to my 12" Indiana Jones figure.
CAL-EEEE-MAH!!!!!!!

Peter Yezukevich said...

Shia is smiling because he knows some people will think he actually grew that mustache, Spielberg is smiling because it is physically impossible for the man to frown, Ray Winstone is smiling because he's an asshole, Harrison Ford is smiling because of CGI, and Karen Allen is smiling because she has in her pocket the first paycheck she's received since Raiders last aired on AMC. And George Lucas is smiling somewhere because he should be dead and that's what you say about dead people.

so'c said...

Thank you Gentlemen, you ease my pain.

Unknown said...

This movie needed Ice Cube.